This word “authentic” is used a lot by people who want to follow a more honest life that reflects more of who they really are. I believe it is what most of us want but have a hard time to live. There are so many reasons why most of us do not live authentically, we are caught up in what others think of us, we have patterns of thoughts and habits that we adopt as normal, we need to fit in or be accepted, etc. On a day-to-day basis we rarely speak or act from our own truth. How many times do we ignore that small wee voice that is telling us something we need to do or not do? How many times do we lie to ourselves or others in order to not have confrontation or disapproval? We often appear on the outside completely different from what we feel on the inside. Living life authentically is a practice that we can become committed too. A client shared with me 2 words today that spoke miles to me, “noise” and “voice”. Noise being all that we hear that has been programmed by others and society about who we are supposed to be or do and our own voice which tells us more often to follow another path.
One way I have learned to let go of some of the “noise” is by doing shadow work. Spending time learning to uncover and love those darker parts of me that have been patterned by a life time of what society and people taught me. Those parts of me that judge, get angry and blame others, or parts of me that say yes to things I know I should not be doing and then being angry at the person for asking! There are wonderful gifts from being honest about how much of our lives that we are not happy about comes from our own choices. There is so much freedom in taking full ownership of all of who we are, both the light and the dark. When we do we shift through the noise and hear our own voice. It begins by being willing to look at yourself and others through a filter of compassion, love and forgiveness. Without this filter we spend too much time beating ourselves or others up through guilt, anger, frustration or shame. I have heard the phrase “keeping it real” a lot these days and to me when I hear people using that saying it is all too often projecting pain on to others. To me being authentic is listening to that inner voice that does not need to hurt someone’s feelings or project pain onto others.
In my own life I have learned that by being authentic with the filter of compassion, love and forgiveness I no longer need the approval of others in the same way I once did nor do I spend needless hours blaming myself or others for my life. I can set much better boundaries and follow through with what I feel lead to even when it may not make sense! 🙂 Because of this when others get angry or struggle with those boundaries I do not take on their projections in the same way I once did either.
“Listening”… truly listening to our own inner guidance can create more passion, love and service to others that comes from a genuine heart not out of some obligation that we end up feeling resentful about.
Today I invite us all to become more authentic where we are following less noise and more of our own voice.